


wish we could turn back time

by awwclint



Series: sf19 bonus round fills [13]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst, Canon Injury, Introspection, Mentions of Self-hatred, Multi, Non-Binary Demiboy Matsukawa, Non-binary Hanamaki, Regret, Trans Female Oikawa, Trans Male Iwaizumi, you can pry these gender hcs from my cold dead hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-09 05:43:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20848469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awwclint/pseuds/awwclint
Summary: Back then, money didn’t matter. They had a shared dream, a promise, a goal. They were going to shine like stars together on the court for as long as they could.





	wish we could turn back time

**Author's Note:**

> title and inspiration from stressed out - twenty one pilots

Tooru can barely keep her eyes open as she sips idly at her green tea, reading over yet another email from her manager.

She’s got another shoot tomorrow. And the day after. And every day this week.

She’s tired.

She’s always loved modelling, but she’s so _tired_.

She shouldn’t complain, though. At least she gets to work with Takahiro sometimes, when her manager allows it. They’ve made a name for themself as a designer, working in America for a few years before returning home to start their own collection.

They sleep even less than Tooru, staying up through the night to sketch new ideas and meet deadlines imposed by their investors.

She loves wearing Takahiro’s designs. They make her feel comfortable and at home like no other designer can ever do.

She’s always loved modelling, and Takahiro’s always loved designing, so it works. She can’t complain, because she’s doing what she loves.

At least they’re both doing what they love. At least they’re happy with their careers.

Hajime never complains, but Tooru _knows_ that he’s miserable.

He’d been happy enough when he’d gone through law school. He’s clever and motivated, and he’d made it through with top marks. When he graduated at the top of his class, Tooru had cried. She’d been a mess.

He’d started off as a paralegal in a small firm, a firm that was just finding its legs, and he’d been brimming with determination and passion.

Seeing that passion crumble and rot hurt Tooru more than anything else.

Hajime never complains, but she knows that they don’t treat him well.

They took the clever, passionate man that she loves, the top of his class with near perfect marks, and they made him a glorified assistant.

Sometimes she can hear him crying at night. Sometimes she can feel his shoulders trembling.

Hajime never cries, and it makes Tooru’s heart ache.

But Hajime never complains, just as Takahiro never complains, just as Tooru never complains.

They don’t complain because, as bad as it may get sometimes for them, Issei has it worse.

At least the three of them make it home every night.

Issei’s always wanted to be an artist. Fae loves drawing, painting, animating.

It was a shock to faer when fae was offered a job at an animation studio.

Hajime is treated badly, but Issei is treated much worse.

Fae often works sixteen hour days. Fae doesn’t have time for anything but work anymore. It’s common for faer to spend two or three nights a week away from home, working until fae can’t keep faer eyes open anymore. Fae’ll pass out for an hour, maybe two, and fae’ll keep working.

Issei never complains, but if anyone has the right to, it’s faer.

All four of them have jobs in fields that they love. Tooru loves modelling more than she loves herself. Takahiro loves designing beautifully androgynous garments. Hajime loves defending the innocent and protecting those who need it. Issei loves animating more than fae has ever loved faerself.

Sometimes, Tooru’s knee flares up while she’s on the runway, and it takes everything she has to keep going. She can push through the physical pain until she’s done, but it’s the emotions that follow that hurt the most.

Her knee flares up, and she remembers the dreams of four naive high school first years. Her knee flares up, and she remembers four jerseys, and a promise to play together on Japan’s national team.

Back then, money didn’t matter. They had a shared dream, a promise, a goal. They were going to shine like stars together on the court for as long as they could.

It all fell apart, and reality set in. It all fell apart, and they’re starting to resent the things they once loved.

None of them have set foot on a volleyball court in over a decade, and it’s slowly killing them.


End file.
